The Best Gift

Saja. Cuba escape from everything. Penat anakku dengan segala benda. Aku baru perasan yg Qihah pun actually update blog sbb dia rasa benda yg sama dengan aku. No one read blog anymore. Coolblog ye la kot. Hmm.

Dulu shumie pernah cakap, hadiah paling berharga dalam dunia ni adalah masa orang sibuk bagi dekat kita. Once aku pernah cakap dekat alya, 'Tak perlu hadiah sebesar Kimio utk bday aku, hanya sekadar doa untuk aku cukup membahagiakan'. Masa time cakap tu sekadar fikir, aku tak kisah pun actually kau tak bagi pape time bday aku. Tak pernah rasa, Wah bestnye ada dalam doa org. Now, sumpa. Bila ada nama lain selain ayah ibu akak ayie semua kerabat dalam doa aku, aku rasa mcm hmm. I dont know. Kenapa tetiba topik neh? Idk. Randomness in the night. Entropy aku memalam ni sumpa tinggi. 

Orang kata, bersyukurlah kita bila nama kita disebut dalam doa seseorang. Yeah. Dia sangat bertuah sbb Allah terbitkan something in me to keep his name in my prayers. Aku tak minta apa-apa balasan pun dari dia bila aku sebut nama dia, I'm just hmm. Entah la. Nak cakap tenangkan hati aku daripada rasa tu pun betul juga. I really want this 'thing' fade and go away. I keep telling myself, 'Mira, one day kau akan baca semua entry diary, tweet, ingat balik apa kau rasa sekarang ni. And that time u'll say to urself -Such a stupid girl I was.' Sumpa tasuka rasa ni. Rasa nak lari tempat lain utk make sure perasaan ni hilang. Dengan org sekeliling nya. Yes. They really make it harder for me. Daripada sparks, sampai dah melarat dah sekarang ni.Sumpa org sekeliling not helping at all. Sampai satu masa aku macam giveup. T_T okay bukan macam. Memang give up. Tapi Hilal Asyraf dgn Ameen Misran cakap, mmg susah nak bertaubat. Elok dah azam, jatuh lagi. Bangun balik. Itu yang Allah nak. Aku try. Insya Allah.

Aku sedih dgn diri sendiri sebab ingt lagi dalam #henshin Aiman Banna cakap, di akhirat nanti kita akan bersama org yg paling kita cintai. Andai Logan Lerman adalah manusia paling kita cintai, we'll with him. If Rasulullah insan paling kita cintai, then we will with Rasulullah. And mira? Tak habis belajar dan berubah lagi aku ni. Tak kuat lagi nak turn everything around. 

Mana nak pujuk.

Frankly speaking. Aku bab decide future segala sangatlah SUCKS. I know. Sorry. But I am. From habis UPSR sampai nak decide pilih course ni ha pun berbaldi air mata aku. Berani aku tulis sini sebab nobody open blogspot anymore. 

Bila org tanya kenapa susah sgt padahal masa dekat Yutipi kan dah amik MechE. Ambil MechE sebab nak sambung Aero. Lepastu, bila dapat opportunity yg senang macam ni mulalah aku pening. Aero punya scope kerja dekat Malaysia tak besar. Dahlah tak besar lepas tu aku ni dah la perempuan. Bila tanya Waie mana nak pilih. Then, electrical more advisable. Sebab? Job opportunity banyak. Luas. Buddy suruh amik quiz engineering. Then. I got aeronautical engineering as the result. Bila buka job application. Berkecai. Tinggal serpih je hati kau ni. 

Kenapa tetiba terlintas nak tukar electrical? Sebab tiba-tiba terlintas last year masa AS. And people keep remind me how difficult for me to learn aeronautical in the future. I hate myself. So, Electrical then. Mana nak pujuk hati ni. Hmm.

As usual, me with the tv show is no matter how annoying or boring the show im always look at the moral of the story. How I met your mother.

I really adored with Barney Stinson in the show. Sumpahlah sangat annoying dia tu. But frankly speaking, I do understand why he act like that. Esp with the game 'haaavvee u met ted?'. It shows there how much he love ted. Ted sangatlah obses cari soulmate dia but people can see how obviously Barney opposed the idea. In spite of that, he help ted. Im really touched about how offensive he is when people said Marshall is Ted's best friend. Nice weyh nice. Sangat comel. He is a lonely person. The way he met Ted and tell him that he wanna be Ted's friend indicate how much he really needs friends. I know, he really annoying. Sampai kadang-kadang aku macam 'okay barney okay!' Lol.

Ive met people with barney's act. Orang lain punya la annoyed dgn dia. Sampai dekat aku, aku kesian. Hmm. Sangat. Sampai org misunderstood dengan kebaikan aku tu. Aku just sedih sbb ada org kena rasa apa itu peritnya desperation in order to find people that can stay with us for a long time. Aku bukan lah nak cakap I have people around me that can stay with me for a long time. But im really sure even theres no one in the world love me anymore I still have Him. :)